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Or else
free sex call 999
Age 32, Male
Rockstar
UK
Joined on 8/1/06
Posted by cookie-monsta1 - March 18th, 2008
Prepare to laugh
Im you cant touch this
Chris says:
Sorry, back again. Msn signed out on me
You cant touch this. says:
how dare thou leave me
Chris says:
I'm sorry baby I can change I swear
You cant touch this. says:
no, you're hurt me for the last time, this is the last straw
Chris says:
Does that mean...?
You cant touch this. says:
it means tomorow you either go to the clinic and fix it or we're through
Chris says:
I told you, they're lice not crabs
You cant touch this. says:
no, i like the lice, we're getting you castrated, you're never cheating on me again, and if you dont ablige, ill have so many bullets put through your mothers face you wont know who it is
Chris says:
Psh, that's your threat?
You cant touch this. says:
thats a promise
Chris says:
Then I see no reason to have the twins removed
You cant touch this. says:
they will be removed to stop your sleeping about town
You cant touch this. says:
resist and ill do it myself
You cant touch this. says:
you think i dont know how to use a spoon?
Chris says:
I think you don't know how to use a razor
Chris says:
THERE, I SAID IT
Chris says:
Your pubes are a mess
You cant touch this. says:
hey, you knowi was always a free bird, dammit it was not ment to be cut
You cant touch this. says:
its ment to grow and be happy
You cant touch this. says:
not cut and oppressed
Chris says:
There's things LIVING in there, I sleep out so I don't have to listen to all the chirping
You cant touch this. says:
hey, do not offend my budgies, they're sencitive
Chris says:
They're fucking magpies
You cant touch this. says:
that too...who can blame them? maybe if you got rid of your crabs there would'nt be magpies in there? ever think of that?
Chris says:
It's because you have that bloody prince albert, Magpies love anything shiny
You cant touch this. says:
you're just jealous cause you cant attract birds to your cock
Chris says:
Not true
Chris says:
You remember that time I had thrush
You cant touch this. says:
yeah....
You cant touch this. says:
fuck you,you're getting castrated and thats final
Chris says:
Chris says:
Nein
You cant touch this. says:
yes you are, the vets already on the way to mine.
Chris says:
He can go to your house all he wants
You cant touch this. says:
yes, to get my sheers, then were comming for you
You cant touch this. says:
and dont try to run
You cant touch this. says:
theres a tracking devise in the urethra of your penis
Chris says:
I'll just stuff it in some random woman and then you'll have a job getting at it
You cant touch this. says:
its hooked on the inerds of your penis
You cant touch this. says:
with a titanium hok
You cant touch this. says:
the oly way thats cuming out is if you cut your dick off
You cant touch this. says:
and if you do
You cant touch this. says:
i win anyway
You cant touch this. says:
so you may as well give in
Chris says:
Why would I take out the tracking device?
You cant touch this. says:
cause if you dont we find you and cut your balls off with the sheers
Chris says:
You can't afford a plane ride
You cant touch this. says:
we're using the vets personal jet
Chris says:
I'll just sail out to sea
You cant touch this. says:
we will land in ireland, use the RSPCA's personal helicopter, land on your boat, cut your balls off and leave you to bleed to death, whilst i make earings of your balls
Chris says:
You're going to land on a dingy?
Chris says:
I doubt it
You cant touch this. says:
o we will, we have Arnold swartsan****r piloting
Chris says:
He's a politician
Chris says:
He's useless
You cant touch this. says:
obviously we are talking about different people
You cant touch this. says:
arnold schwarzenegger and Arnold swartsan****r are two different people
Chris says:
Oh, you're talking about the one in the suit with the 'fro
Chris says:
He's a /b/tard
You cant touch this. says:
but a good helicopter driver
You cant touch this. says:
so
You cant touch this. says:
you're left with a choice
You cant touch this. says:
run, andbe caught
You cant touch this. says:
or take it on the chin
You cant touch this. says:
either way
You cant touch this. says:
by the timeall this is over
You cant touch this. says:
you will suck my balls kyle
Posted by cookie-monsta1 - January 5th, 2008
HO HO HO
Blackburn dumped out of F.A cup by Coventry =D
Michael Mifsud scored twice as Coventry marched into the FA Cup fourth round at the expense of below-par Blackburn.
Malta international Mifsud opened the scoring with a hooked volley from 12 yards before Elliot Ward expertly slotted home from the penalty spot.
Dele Adebola made the game safe with a clinical third to ensure David Bentley's low strike was only a consolation to a weakened Rovers side.
And Mifsud's rasping drive in stoppage-time completed the rout.
Iain Dowie's side are currently languishing in 17th in the Championship, but they left their Premier League hosts humiliated and can add this scalp to their Carling Cup win at Manchester United earlier in the season.
Mark Hughes started with established regulars Stephen Warnock, Ryan Nelsen and Morten Gamst Pedersen on the substitutes' bench.
But Holland under-21 striker Maceo Rigters, homegrown midfielder Keith Treacy and defensive pair Bruno Berner and Zurab Khizanishvili failed to cope with the rampant visitors.
Benni McCarthy spurned an excellent opportunity to open the scoring shortly before the half-hour mark, firing straight into Dimi Konstantopoulos's midriff after beating the offside trap and racing clean through.
But from then on, Rovers were pegged back and crumbled under pressure.
Mifsud, who joined Coventry from Norwegian outfit Lillestrom 12 months ago, seized on Chris Samba's weak defensive header and hooked a volley from 12 yards which deflected off Berner and looped over Brad Friedel into the far corner.
Jay Tabb's fine shot from 20 yards smacked the crossbar and bounced up for Leon Best, who was shoved in the back by Khizanishvili as he tried to head the ball into the net from inside the six-yard box.
Ward ruthlessly dispatched the spot kick to put the Sky Blues in total control at 2-0.
Adebola was then allowed to race clear to fire home left-footed for a third.
And although Bentley's low strike raised a brief cheer among the home fans, Mifsud's delightful strike in stoppage-time almost burst the net and ensured Coventry had the final say.
--------------------------------------
--------------------------------------
----
Blackburn: Friedel, Emerton (Pedersen 61), Samba, Khizanishvili, Berner, Bentley, Mokoena, Kerimoglu, Treacy (Derbyshire 69), McCarthy, Rigters (Nelsen 60).
Subs Not Used: Brown, Warnock.
Booked: Khizanishvili.
Goals: Bentley 85.
Coventry: Konstantopoulos, Osbourne, Ward, Turner, Borrowdale, Mifsud, Doyle, Michael Hughes, Tabb, Adebola, Best.
Subs Not Used: De Zeeuw, Kyle, Simpson, Gray, Thornton.
Booked: Doyle.
Goals: Mifsud 34, Ward 64 pen, Adebola 83, Mifsud 90.
Att: 14,421
Ref: Lee Probert (Wiltshire).
:D
Posted by cookie-monsta1 - November 26th, 2007
People, the mods are here to enforce rules, not create them, they're ruining your fun by making rules which arn't actually Rules, so sign this petition to show admins what their power hungry mods are doing.
Posted by cookie-monsta1 - November 10th, 2007
I have now owned a 100wt vox valvetronix amp for two months.
I can safely say i love it.
So share, what amp do you own?
Also Xenogenocide is the best NG artist :P
Posted by cookie-monsta1 - October 2nd, 2007
And at the middle right of the pool there is a bigbadron look-a-like.
CONSPIRACY?
Posted by cookie-monsta1 - September 8th, 2007
It was my birthday THREEE days ago.
I decided to make a blog now cause i was to lazy to on my actual birthday
also. ima changin to fab
cause all the cooly cool people have fab aurora paposwing zef ect :D
also i got a NEW VOX AMP
its teh hugeness
id post picks
but that requires effort
i will at some later point
also
PAPOSWINGS MA BIATCH
also
i buttsecked up BBR
he like 35
lets all laugh :D
i havva ps3
although ive had it ages
like
3ish months :D
ima hav a bigga penis than chuu >:D
gday :P